Scrapping the “Hard Stuff”

Scrapping the “Hard Stuff” – Why you NEED to do it, and how to get through it

By Shawn Hillenbrand

Why do you scrapbook?  Maybe you don’t thank about WHY, but maybe we all should.  If you are anything like me, there isn’t just one answer to this question, and that discussion could probably be a blog post of its own.  Having said that, I think for most of us, somewhere on that list would be that we scrapbook to preserve memories.  That may mean we are preserving them for our children and grandchildren, for our spouse, for the history books when we become famous or maybe we just like having them for ourselves to look back on. 

But here is the thing.  Not all memories are good. Yes, I said it.  Not all memories are good.  But it doesn’t mean they aren’t worth remembering, and therefore worth scrapping.  It just makes it harder to do. For a bit of background for those who don’t know me (hi), 2019 was a TERRIBLE year for me and my family.  Worst year of my life, and I’m not even exaggerating.  I lost my husband of 26 years on 3/14/19 after a 5+ year battle with about 7 different kinds of Cancer, making me a widow at 46 years old.  We then lost his uncle who had help raise him since he was 13 AND his cousin’s husband within just a few months.  See – NOT A GOOD year.

But in some ways, we were very fortunate.  We had an AMAZING support system of friends of family who loved us (and still do) and held us close.  And we had warning, which so many people do not get. Jason got to go with me to the funeral home and help plan his own services. Thanks to the generosity of others close to us and our Evansville Westside community, Jason got to log an hour of flight as a pilot, and we go to take him and his mother to Universal Studios and Walt Disney World. In other words, we created as many memories as we could as quickly as we could once we knew the ending was inevitable.  While it sounds like fun, NONE of these are good memories to me.  But I took pictures anyway. And they were just as important for me to scrapbook as my kids birthday’s – maybe even more so. 

I am sure you have heard people who don’t like Social Media because “it’s just all so fake, and people only post what makes them look good”.  Don’t let that be your scrapbooks.  Include the good with the bad.  Scrapbook your REAL life.  Even the yucky parts.  Easier than it sounds, right? Maybe.  So here are a few hints to help make it easier, and how I applied them:

-          Be prepared to hate the results.  You aren’t going to like the finished product, even though they may be the most beautiful pages you ever make.  Give yourself this permission.  Document it and move on. I promise they aren’t as bad as you think. And you can always put them in a specific album so you won’t accidentally have to look at them if you don’t want to (I totally have an album that may never be opened – feel special that you get to see photos of some of those layouts)

-          Use product you LOVE – SPLURGE if necessary. If you love a certain paper line, or stickers, or certain color schemes – now is the perfect time to use them, or even go out and buy something you want but usually would spend the $$ on.  For me, this was a kit to make a whole album, and the price was fairly hefty. Which leads me to…..

-          KITS or tools can be your friend.  I don’t use kits often because they don’t feel like “MY” work.  But for this, I was not going to like the pages anyway, so better I hate someone else’s work than my own, right? This would also be a great time to employ a tool you may not have tried like the templates from Kiwi Lane.  (ask Hannah or our resident Kiwi Lane guru – Staci)

-          Give yourself goals and/or a stopping point. (AND MAYBE EVEN A REWARD).  I set specific goals for getting these pages done, and then gave myself a little reward.  Make two hard pages, and then let yourself make a fun one.  Plan going in that you only have to make this one page, or this one album, or whatever and then know you can put it away. I let myself scrap a short Hawaii trip after I got the Disney book done.

-          Give yourself TIME.  This may sound like it conflicts with the last point, but not really.  Don’t try to scrapbook a tragic event RIGHT after it happens.  Allow yourself a little time and a bit of perspective.  Not only will it be easier on you – it might allow you to tell a better and more complete story – not to mention it keeps the tear stains off your paper.  I didn’t scrap the Disney trip until September, and it was in February.

-          LASTLY – Ask for help if you need it! You may have a scrappy group of friends who could help – maybe they could all make one page for you, maybe they can help with design ideas, maybe they can just be a shoulder for you to cry on, or a voice to cheer you on.  Maybe Hannah is your “friend” and she can help you find just the right products (or ask me – I am an EXCELLENT shopper – LOL).  Or maybe you take a moment to meditate or pray and ask for help in that way as well. 

It’s OK – you’ve got this – just remember WHY you’re doing it. Even the worst parts of our lives our only temporary.

Much love,

Shawn